What to do if I can’t get control of compulsions?
“Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding” Prov. 3:5.
We heard James McDonald on the radio this morning asserting that I need to “Make no provision for the flesh.” Thereby inferring that I should “DO” things to “PREVENT” access to the corruption that I struggle with.
The next rationalization (rational Lies – ation) is that I need to put a “Tattler” on my access to the internet so that my “Accountability Partners” know what I’m viewing. This is a such a consistent conventional teaching in recent years, I fear that again, I will be criticized for disagreeing. But I do disagree and am convinced such mechanisms and human to human networks are powerfully deceptive. They lead us into first thinking we have the keys to victory and then taking credit for winning the battle.
Can we agree that: hiding the chocolate because you’re weak isn’t the same as no longer lusting after the satisfaction of consuming it.
Behavior modification and control of the actions one takes in life (out of strict, willful “obedience”) are not the same as genuine healing.
Obedience in the absence of grace is an artifact of living under the law. It’s tempting to substitute this work for “Waiting on the Lord.” Why? Because it’s far easier to quench my need to be “doing something” and be self-satisfied I’m taking “appropriate action” than it is to rest on the promise of God.
Pharisees will teach you that you have to take action. God teaches that we wait for the Spirit. “Perfect Love” disarms fear. What am I afraid of? Personal failure, an inability to control my urges? That somebody will find out? Yes I should fight this battle, and never give up, never concede. But I fight the battle. I don’t build ramparts to protect me so that I don’t have to stand in the fight trusting the full armor of God. Shouldn’t I be more concerned about how God sees me, than being “accountable” to a compatriot for where I visit on the internet?
“‘Be ever hearing, but never understanding; be ever seeing, but never perceiving.’ Make the heart of this people calloused; make their ears dull and close their eyes. Otherwise they might see with their eyes, hear with their ears, understand with their hearts, and turn and be healed.” Is. 6:9-10
A note written in the back of my bible is the best way I know of to share the understanding as I know it…